Dating After Divorce

Remember when you were 18 and had a hard time hitting on the cute girl in Science class? Well, now you’re 50, in a job where there are no single women, and are back in the dating world for the first time in over 20 years. Where do you start? What’s the first step in finding that connection again? We take a look into online dating after divorce to see where you went wrong the first time, and where you can go from here.

Writing online personals are hard, especially when you don’t know what you want. Do you want the same comfort you had in your marriage with an online friend, or do you want something new, risky and exciting and write an adult personal add? There’s a world of possibilities when you’re trying to find your match online, but when you don’t narrow your field, things can look intimidating.

Get back into the water slowly. You just got divorced, so you’re not looking for another marriage. Try making friends online until you’re comfortable enough with someone to see if they would like to progress a relationship. This doesn’t have to mean wining and dining her before you go back to your place. It can be as simple as meeting for a coffee on your lunch breaks to see what your connection is like without the computer screen as a safety net.

Most people have a hard time getting back in the dating game after a divorce because they bring along issues from their past relationship into their new one. Everyone that just went through a relationship has baggage. It could be trust issues, fidelity problems, or not knowing how to tell your new girlfriend that you have a five year old son. These are things that almost all divorced people have to go through when they start dating again. It’s important to remember that whoever you see going forward isn’t who you’ve seen in the past. Keep an open mind about who you’re going to see, look for someone with the personality traits you want in a match, and stay away from the ones who raise red-flags. Online dating allows you to find a match that is targeted specifically towards your wants.

Make sure not to put too much pressure on yourself. It’s your first time back out, and no one is expecting you to hit a home run your first time back at bat. The online world is filled with people who could be your next fling, your next girlfriend, or your next wife, so long on and get chatting.