Attracting A Good Match
How do I know if the people I’m attracting online are a good fit for me?
This question is the key reason honesty in online personals is crucial.
When you’re trying to find a date online, it’s difficult to dig through the bad ones to find the good when you don’t exactly who is messaging you. Body language is a big part of intimate connections, and without that factor, you can be left confused on who you’re being messaged by, and who you want to message back.
The most important thing to do when you’re writing your profile is to be honest about who you are. When you have genuine interests and personality traits showing on your profile, then people have the opportunity to be attracted to the real you. It’s not often that someone has a strong attraction to you and you feel nothing in return, so letting people be attracted to you can grow an organic connection in return.
A good ‘test’ to see if you are attracting the right kinds of people is by a short IM conversation. When people are messaging through online inboxes, they have time to think about their answers and re-read your profile to make sure what they’re saying is what they think you want to hear, not what they really mean. IM conversations are much more like telephone conversations in that they don’t have the time to think about their answers, they simply react naturally with answers they mean. If you like what they’re saying and how they’re saying it, then you’re probably having a real connection.
Make sure a person is never judging you by your profile picture alone. If the first message you get from someone only expresses that you look good or they recognize the area you’re in, then you may want to shy away. Showing they have no interest in your profile or what it says is a good indication that they only want you for how you look, and that’s not a proper way to find your match. Be on guard for people who aren’t interested in your personality. It’s very rarely that relationships last on physical attraction alone.
When trying to find a real connection, do what you would do in the real world: Speak with them and see if you are compatible. People are born with natural instincts about their feelings towards people. If you think you like them, then pursue the conversation and see where it goes. If they rub you the wrong way, then take that as a warning sign and walk away. You’re never losing something by ending an online relationship before it starts. There’s millions of people who log onto internet dating sites daily, so you’ll always have other puzzle pieces to choose from until you find your match.
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