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7 Ways An Emotionally Challenged Man Shows That He Cares

emotionally_challenged_men

emotionally_challenged_men

Being notoriously known as an emotionally unavailable man for most of my adult life, I can honestly say that elusive men like ourselves get a horrible reputation for being soulless, vindictive and spineless bastards whose only real function in this world is to remind women of attractive and fictional characters from HBO shows so they can feel better about their love lives that “seem” to give off uncanny resemblances to these glamorized sitcoms that are ironically mostly written by women.

Sure, most of us emotionally unavailable guys out there are beyond selfish.  We charm you, seduce you and ultimately disappear on you when you show even the tiniest sign of wanting a commitment. We do break a lot of hearts and it mainly stems from the fact that unlike women that are stronger and are ready, willing and able to seek out love even after horrible breakups, we can’t seem to move on from the pain and become emotionally stunted because of that.

However, it should be noted that contrary to popular belief, there is a huge difference between emotionally unavailable and emotionally-challenged. An emotionally unavailable man is mostly a lost cause and will never be the man you want him to be and will most likely disappoint you. An emotionally-challenged man however may seem like he’s unavailable, but is ultimately dealing with a few hangups. He may have an issue with hand holding, sleeping over or labels and you may question if you are just a friend with benefits to him.

However, these men may show glimmers of hope and if you are dealing with these certain types of men, here are some weird tell tale signs that he cares for you more than he may let on:

1. He Rather Hang Out First Before Initiating Sex

Okay, so you’re casually dating a guy that is frustrating you beyond belief due to the fact that he never initiates sex and seduces you right away. He comes to visit you and sometimes you just want to pounce on him at the door and he stops you. Ladies, don’t be immediately discouraged. If a guy rather talk to you and watch a movie with you before initiating sex, this does not mean that he doesn’t like you, in fact it means the opposite. I am a firm believer that there is nothing more erotic than a good conversation with a woman–especially a woman you like. An unavailable man is not looking for this. Sure he’s full of passion and may turn you on as soon as you hit the couch, but it’s only to fulfill his own sexual needs. He doesn’t want to talk or get to know you better. He try everything in his power to get laid as quick as possible. If you are dating a guy that although may not be Don Juan right away but likes spending time with you, trust me, there is a connection.

2. He Texts You “How Was Your Day?” Every Day

So he doesn’t send you gushy texts like “I miss you,” “Thinking of You,” “Wish you were here.” Instead you get seemingly boring texts from him like “How is it going?” and “How was your day?” on the regular and it makes you question if he really likes you or not. Guess what, ladies? Although it may seem dull as f*ck, an emotionally-challenged guy texting you “How was your day?” is far more interested in you than an emotionally available man that texts you “What are you wearing?” and “Can I come over?” Why you may ask? When a guy really likes you, he actually is wondering what you are doing and actually cares to hear the monotonous details of your day and if he does so at his own leisure and on a regular basis, he does think about you, miss you and wish you were with him. It may not be the most passionate of texts, however it does mean a lot more than you would think.

3. He Leaves His Phone Out In The Open

No matter if a guys says he’s not ready for a serious relationship, if he purposely leaves his phone out in the open while you’re hanging out and even leaves to use the bathroom without taking it with him, trust me, he’s into you and most likely, only you. A guy who has something to hide or a guy who is afraid of any commitment, will never do this guaranteed.

4. His Fridge Is Stocked With Food

I’m telling you right now, single men do not stock their fridges full of food unless they know a woman they like is coming over. If they’re just interested in a booty call, then they only stock their fridge with alcohol. This is a subtle way of expressing his interest in you. He took the time to go grocery shopping not only to impress you, but also to keep you at his place longer.

5. He Picks Up The Phone In Front of His Boys

If your emotionally-challenged fella is having a guy’s night out and picks up the phone when you call, you have definitely sparked his interest in you. I’m telling you right now that I have never picked up a phone call from a girl I wasn’t serious about unless it was late and I was drunk looking for a booty call while I was with my friends. Bonus points for a guy who asks you “How was your day?” in front of his buddies.

6. He Leaves His Condoms At Your Place

A man who is not interested in committing to you, will NEVER,ever leave unused condoms at your place. He will take them for future encounters with other women. However, if a guy truly likes you, he will leave them at your place. This is a biggie because it shows that he trusts you and that you can trust him. Don’t believe me? The next time he comes to hang out with you, hide one of the condoms and see how he reacts. Trust me, he has memorized the number of condoms he leaves over. ;)

7. He Gives You The Last Piece Of Food

If this guy gives you his last piece of food, then it’s true love. Nuff said.

Now I’m not saying that if you are dating an emotionally-challenged guy who shows you these signs that he is the one for you. However, if you are dating a guy who shows you these signs then you shouldn’t feel afraid to communicate what you want from your relationship with him.  If he can’t deal with a commitment when you want one, then leave. If he really is into you (and if he shows all these signs) then he will smarten up and do what it takes to keep you in his life. 

THOUGHTS? Let me know in the comment section below!!! 

4 Comments

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  1. August 27, 2013, 6:01 am

    This is a GREAT list!! I completely agree with all those points … just wish I had this earlier in my dating life!! You’re right, it’s a person’s actions that give you the answers you need, not what they tell you. Actions, not words, right? Love this post!

    • Jimmy Jacob says
      August 27, 2013, 6:27 am

      Actions speaker louder than words as they say….however, if a guy is too afraid to say the words after a while, then he’s not man enough to be with you. :)

  2. August 28, 2013, 10:24 am

    Love this Jimmy! It is all about the little things…..

  3. Q says
    August 28, 2013, 10:43 am

    Booyah! You hit it right on the head! Especially the texting part. What comes off as boring to some is Mr. Sensitive to the smart ones. I’ve been that guy who enjoys the nuances of a relationship yet comes off as not having “an edge” or being boring. I’ve also been that guy who only wants one thing and that never lasts long in regards to a relationship. If women read more insightful things like this blog post, then they would understand that they can have the best of both worlds if they would just open their eyes and pay attention.

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